THOR movie script review *SPOILERS*

[SaturnKnight]

Hmmm... interesting. Very interesting. Because it's more LORD OF THE RINGS than a typical Marvel superhero movie. Not what I was expecting.

Originally Posted by IESB.net

THOR begins, simply enough, with a black screen and mystical narration, describing THE CREATION OF THE NINE WORLDS. The NINE WORLDS and its inhabitants are then introduced, each paragraph becoming so much more overwhelmingly verbose, that one can nearly hear the film's producers scratching their collective heads from here.

From the inky void, the seers URD, VERDAND and SKULD describe the populating of the worlds, including A HUMONGOUS COW that feeds YMIR, the first FROST GIANT and his family. GNOMES and FAERIES come into the picture, followed by THE GODS OF ASGARD. There's some godly begetting that goes on - ODIN KING OF THE GODS follows and finally he begets our hero THOR. (Oh yeah, ODIN creates Man and Woman to worship him, too - lucky sod.)

The narration ends, and we are introduced to the adult THOR and LOKI , THOR'S BROTHER, THE WARRIORS THREE (FANDRAL, HOGUN and VOLSTAGG) ASGARD's MOST POPULAR BOY BAND - just kidding here, and BALDER, his advisor as they ride their great horses through SVARTALFHEIM in search of IVALDI, KING OF THE GNOMES.

At some point in the middle of THOR's thrilling battle with a HELL STAG (page 15, I think) I dropped my Norse Mythology for Dummies book in disgust and chucked my battered Engelsk-Norsk dictionary into the wastebasket.

They were slowing me down. I had a script to read and a review to write. Meanwhile, during the hell staggy conflict, THOR saves many gnomes, but his great wooden hammer is destroyed. IVALDI promises to make him a new hammer.

THIS ENDETH THE SPOILERS

THOR is a meaty script. Without doing any serious research, it certainly appears writer Protosevich has worked to recreate the legend as "accurately" as possible.

Nevertheless, I wished I had called Judy at Time-Life books and ordered their seventeen volume set of Norse Myths and Legends. I was already lost in the great confusion of so many throwaway names for so many things. Two pages after reading it, I couldn't even remember if LIDSKJALF was ODIN'S THRONE, or the Ligonberry jelly I bought at IKEA.

But this is not your father's THOR. It's not even Vincent D'Onofrio's THOR from Chris Columbus' ADVENTURES IN BABYSITTING. This is not THOR the superhero as portrayed in the Marvel comics - a god on Earth who performs super-heroic feats, rescues damsels in distresses, fights supervillains and does all of the usual stuff straight out of the “How To Be A Superhero Handbook.” This is the tale of THOR, son of Odin and Prince of Asgard and his journey from arrogant boob (not the good kind-sorry folks) to the true
heroic ideal.

This disappointed me. Despite the well-drawn characters and thrilling adventures , as I was reading the script, I kept wanting to see THOR in present day New York.

Another key element that was missing from the script for me was its portrayal of ASGARD somehow. I was hoping this ASGARD would be some how influenced by the work of THOR co-creator, the late great comic god Jack Kirby. But no, this version will give its Production Designer(s) the chance to create stunning richly detailed Nine Worlds more "realistically", and again, as a comic book geek I was disappointed. I really wanted to get my Kirby on here.

THOU ART MORE SPOILAGE BELOW

THOR gets his new hammer Mjolnir, goes a little bit nuts with it and is banished from Asgard, allowing LOKI to get all GRIMA WORMTONGUE and make plans to take over as ruler of ASGARD.THOR is humiliated and plot plot plot THOR is joined by THE WARRIORS THREE, plot plot plot and regains
his hammer. Theres are a lot of special effects as ASGARD goes to war and THOR faces the treacherous LOKI and there is the obligatory "A New Hero Is Born" ending.

THIS ENDETH THE PLOT SPOILAGE

The hard PG-13 / light R rated telling of THOR's story may be spectacular, but I can't see the movie becoming the next Spider-Man or even the next Ghost Rider for Marvel Films. I simply can't imagine a line of THOR action figures, fast food tie-in toys or any merchandising outside of a soundtrack. Not to mention there's no product placement possible with this script. Well maybe Scandinavian Airlines System or SAS could get some ancillary action and offer THOR flights to famous fjords (like the one with Slartibartfast's signature on the glacier)!

Now, I know all of my marketing musings really have nothing to do with the script, but films based on comics have become events, with huge amounts of additional income generated through cross-promotional items, like my still-unopened X-MEN 2 ROGUE can of Dr. Pepper, and despite the film's many strengths I can't see THOR hitting the kind of financial figures the bigwigs have come to expect.

Despite my geek misgivings and musings of the lack of happy meal toys, what did I think? THOR is a very good script to be sure, but it's humorless. It has some very good action sequences and Kirbyesque imagery or not, THOR does have the promise of blowing movie goers' eye sockets out with amazing never-before-seen worlds of Norse mythology, especially now that STARDUST director Matthew Vaughn is reportedly at the helm. I can't wait to see it on the big screen.

THOR rates a CONAN THE BARBARIAN out of a possible X-MEN 2, or 7 stars out of 10. Mr. E wonders whatever happened to Maia Brewton of ADVENTURES IN BABYSITTING and "Parker Lewis Can't Lose.” Serious replies can be sent care of IESB.net.

[NeoSamurai]

that sounds good if it was just supposed to be viking myth instead of Marvel Comics Thor. For a Marvel Comics Thor it sounds like crap.

[TheScantronman]

Originally Posted by NeoSamurai

that sounds good if it was just supposed to be viking myth instead of Marvel Comics Thor. For a Marvel Comics Thor it sounds like crap.

Eh I'd rather it be straight mythological than a bunch of superheroics.

[NeoSamurai]

Originally Posted by TheScantronman

Eh I'd rather it be straight mythological than a bunch of superheroics.

it could be both--but nothing about this review says "Marvel Comics Superhero" imo. like I said, it's a good idea if it's just supposed to be about the mythos.

[TheScantronman]

Originally Posted by NeoSamurai

it could be both--but nothing about this review says "Marvel Comics Superhero" imo.

And that could make it successful. The first Blade movie was never really promoted as being based in Marvel comics lore and it was only after its success that Marvel plastered its logo all over the second one.

[rdrsfn82]

Originally Posted by NeoSamurai

it could be both--but nothing about this review says "Marvel Comics Superhero" imo. like I said, it's a good idea if it's just supposed to be about the mythos.

See I like this approach. Then if you have a sequel or an Avengers movie you want to put Thor in you have him show up in New York and you have the other characters he's interacting with doubt who he is. It's kind of the opposite of the way the comic was handled in that his first appearances were on Earth with Donald Blake and all that but later on they told all the flashbacks to his time in Asgard and had him return to battle frost giants and such. This way fans know that he really is a god amongst men when he shows up on Earth, while the people in the movie won't know whether he's just another super hero or if he is who he says he is.

[VocalMan81]

Originally Posted by TheScantronman

Eh I'd rather it be straight mythological than a bunch of superheroics.

I completely agree. If I see NYC one more time in a Marvel movie, I'm gonna puke. And Thor is much more than a superhero, he's a god of myth!

[rdrsfn82]

Originally Posted by TheScantronman

And that could make it successful. The first Blade movie was never really promoted as being based in Marvel comics lore and it was only after its success that Marvel plastered its logo all over the second one.

In fairness Blade was popular enough on it's own to get a sequel, not because it was a comic character but because Wesley Snipes played a really really badass version of the character and there were some great fight scenes in the movie. The opening of that movie in the dance club is still one of the best action movie openings of all time.

[TheScantronman]

Originally Posted by rdrsfn82

In fairness Blade was popular enough on it's own to get a sequel, not because it was a comic character but because Wesley Snipes played a really really badass version of the character and there were some great fight scenes in the movie. The opening of that movie in the dance club is still one of the best action movie openings of all time.

Exactly my point. The character was done so well that it didn't matter that it was a comic book movie, even if the general public didn't really know that to begin with.

Get Thor a really epic, myth-laden movie to start with and then Marvel-ize him later. Greg Rucka did some great things with Wonder Woman and mythology and I think similar things could be done with Thor.

[House Of Me]

Lord Of The Ring-ish? You've just turned me off....

[rdrsfn82]

Originally Posted by TheScantronman

Exactly my point. The character was done so well that it didn't matter that it was a comic book movie, even if the general public didn't really know that to begin with.

Get Thor a really epic, myth-laden movie to start with and then Marvel-ize him later. Greg Rucka did some great things with Wonder Woman and mythology and I think similar things could be done with Thor.

Yep I agree. People went to watch Lord of the Rings and the Narnia movies and such because they are giant spectacles. They will see Thor for the same reason if it's done well enough.

[SaturnKnight]

Originally Posted by House Of Me

Lord Of The Ring-ish? You've just turned me off....

Hmmm... I think you may be wrong on your take about this, though.

If Matthew Vaughn does it as if it were the Walt Simonson run of Thor? It'll be brilliant.

And I agree with how this script would let Thor seamlessly flow into an AVENGERS movie for his first meeting with Iron Man and Captain America.

Assuming that the scuttlebutt is correct, and Marvel is doing IM, Thor & Cap as an introductory trilogy to set up the Avengers film franchise... I mean, Jesu Cristos, that would be friggin' perfect!

[BanMan]

I'm not watching it until I get confirmation that he yells "I SAY THEE NAAAAY!!!!!"

[royce73]

Originally Posted by TheScantronman

Exactly my point. The character was done so well that it didn't matter that it was a comic book movie, even if the general public didn't really know that to begin with.

Get Thor a really epic, myth-laden movie to start with and then Marvel-ize him later. Greg Rucka did some great things with Wonder Woman and mythology and I think similar things could be done with Thor.

I agree with this. Establish Asgard, the Norse Gods, and the rivalry with Loki. We have enough Super-Hero-in-the-City movies already. You could bring in some more cosmic Marvel elements like Beta Ray Bill but the Norse myth should be the basis for the movie.

[TheScantronman]

Originally Posted by royce73

I agree with this. Establish Asgard, the Norse Gods, and the rivalry with Loki. We have enough Super-Hero-in-the-City movies already. You could bring in some more cosmic Marvel elements like Beta Ray Bill but the Norse myth should be the basis for the movie.

And you'd think at some point with all these super powered beings appearing in NYC all the time that eventually the wonder of it all would just become commonplace to the general public.


"Did you see that guy shoot lightning from his hammer!?"

"Jeez, what are you, a tourist? That sh*t happens all the time!"

[chap22]

Originally Posted by BanMan

I'm not watching it until I get confirmation that he yells "I SAY THEE NAAAAY!!!!!"

seconded.

[Thunderstorm]

I don't like the idea. Lord of the Rings was awesome because it had MUCH higher production values, budget, and casting than a Thor movie would ever get. If they want to do an accurate history of Thor, I'd be all for that. If it's Marvel Thor, it should be at least partially a story of a God coming to Earth and learning to respect and love the inhabitants.

Plus, it's Hollywood and I KNOW they would ____ up Asgard 100 different ways and I would absolutely snap.

[SaturnKnight]

Originally Posted by TheScantronman

And you'd think at some point with all these super powered beings appearing in NYC all the time that eventually the wonder of it all would just become commonplace to the general public.


"Did you see that guy shoot lightning from his hammer!?"

"Jeez, what are you, a tourist? That sh*t happens all the time!"

Yeah. That is my one biggest complaint about Marvel Comics: everyone is in friggin' New York. Sheesh, what about Chicago, Dallas, Miami, Houston, Washington D.C., Los Angeles, San Francisco, Seattle, hello?

[NeoSamurai]

Originally Posted by Thunderstorm

I don't like the idea. Lord of the Rings was awesome because it had MUCH higher production values, budget, and casting than a Thor movie would ever get. If they want to do an accurate history of Thor, I'd be all for that. If it's Marvel Thor, it should be at least partially a story of a God coming to Earth and learning to respect and love the inhabitants.

Let's also not forget that Narina and LotR have had legions of fans in literature in comparison to the fans of Thor.

[Thunderstorm]

Originally Posted by NeoSamurai

Let's also not forget that Narina and LotR have had legions of fans in literature in comparison to the fans of Thor.

Yeah that gives them free reign to butcher it either way. I'd rather never see a Thor movie than have it done wrong. I see this more as Dungeons and Dragons than LotR... with a stupid Wrestler as Thor.

[SaturnKnight]

Originally Posted by NeoSamurai

Let's also not forget that Narina and LotR have had legions of fans in literature in comparison to the fans of Thor.

Thor's been huge with an entire generation of Baby Boomers and GenXers. Most current fans don't know or remember this, but Marvel Comics was the lead cover story on Rolling Stone magazine back in the early 70s (featured the Hulk). Marvel Comics has been a very big part of pop culture with many consumers for decades--not just direct market fanboys.

Also, that is part of the rationale behind the story concept: to hook fantasy fans of mystical filmfare (such as LOTR, Narnia and Harry Potter). It's a damn shrewd and very smart move.

Again, I refer you to Walt Simonson's run of Thor as proof of how the movie can very much reflect the comics.

[TheScantronman]

Originally Posted by Thunderstorm

Yeah that gives them free reign to butcher it either way. I'd rather never see a Thor movie than have it done wrong. I see this more as Dungeons and Dragons than LotR... with a stupid Wrestler as Thor.

Yeah Matthew Vaughn would totally go for that.

He's already he said he wants some dude from Rome to play Thor.

My biggest worry is which comes out first, Captain Marvel or Thor. If they go the Donald Blake route with Thor, it's going to be seen as a knockoff of Captain Marvel if it comes out after DC's film. And the opposite is also true.

Mythological Thor FTW. Far more interesting.

[House Of Me]

I've just seen pics of Kevin Durand (Vaughn's choice)....not impressed.

[SaturnKnight]

Originally Posted by TheScantronman

Yeah Matthew Vaughn would totally go for that.

He's already he said he wants some dude from Rome to play Thor.

My biggest worry is which comes out first, Captain Marvel or Thor. If they go the Donald Blake route with Thor, it's going to be seen as a knockoff of Captain Marvel if it comes out after DC's film. And the opposite is also true.

Mythological Thor FTW. Far more interesting.

Oooo... good point!

I totally agree with you on that. Better to skip on Donald Blake (at least for now) and maybe introduce him in the sequel(s).

I'm still surprised no one else has mentioned how much this script echoes Simonson's Thor. It's the bestselling run of Thor that I know of and it was also one of the best damn comic books ever. This movie sounds very much like Simonson's run--and that's a damn good thing (IMHO).

[webhead10]

i'd like to see a marvel comics approach, instead of an LOTR approach. maybe it's just b/c i recently watched crappy pathfinder that i don't want to see a movie like that lol